


Not Their Intended Use

by frozenCinders



Category: Yu-Gi-Oh! Duel Monsters (Anime & Manga)
Genre: M/M, several innocent chocolates were harmed in the making of this fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-20
Updated: 2020-05-20
Packaged: 2021-03-02 20:55:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,353
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24293203
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/frozenCinders/pseuds/frozenCinders
Summary: Seto has admittedly made some mistakes in his life, butthis oneis possibly the worst. He should have known Bakura would rather torture him with the gift he specifically asked for than actually accept it.
Relationships: Yami Bakura/Kaiba Seto
Comments: 2
Kudos: 11





	Not Their Intended Use

**Author's Note:**

> based on a concept i made several joke tweets about and just couldn't get out of my head. yami bakura is possibly the funniest character in ygo and i love him for it

Seto has admittedly made some mistakes in his life, but _this one_ is possibly the worst. He should have known Bakura would rather torture him with the gift he specifically asked for than actually accept it.

"You're rich, why don't you ever buy me anything?" he'd joked. "I want some fancy chocolates. You know, like lovers get each other."

Seto had given him an unamused look and Bakura laughed and went about his day. Even though he was clearly joking, what he said stuck with Seto. They've been... together, he guesses, for a while now, yet neither of them have actually made any romantic gestures towards the other. No dates, no gifts, no declarations of love-- because they're both too stubborn to admit that they enjoy each other's company, and that it is, in fact, _not_ just a "running joke" whenever Bakura kisses Seto goodbye, or whenever he claims to be Seto's boyfriend. Hell, Bakura is so inherently disingenuous that maybe he just _can't_ sound like he's telling the truth anymore.

So, Seto indulged him. He went out and bought him some expensive chocolates like he wanted and successfully played it off as part of their weird ongoing comedy routine with each other. He said that Bakura had better beat him at duel monsters some day, or he'll be expecting a favor in return. Bakura grinned and promised to pay him back for each and every chocolate that he would eat.

His wording should have been a dead giveaway, but Seto suspected nothing. The first time it happened, he could tell it was never going to end-- not until all thirty chocolates had been expended. Not by eating them, of course, because Bakura had other, incomprehensible plans.

No, the first time a chocolate was "spent", Bakura had come running to Seto, claiming there was a fire in the mansion. He didn't give Seto a moment to react before dragging him out of the room by the arm, away from his phone, laptop, _anything_ he could use to actually get help. Seto was confused when Bakura took him to one of the rooms with a fireplace.

"Look!" he exclaimed, pointing at the harmlessly small fire. It was at that point that his act shattered and he broke into a mischievous smile.

"... It's a fire," Seto admitted, seeing nothing he could do aside from humoring Bakura.

"Yes... but look again!"

While Seto was glaring at the fire, Bakura threw something into it. When Seto looked back at Bakura, he had an empty chocolate wrapper in his hand and a shit-eating grin on his face.

It was at that moment that Seto caught onto the game Bakura was going to force him to play twenty nine more times.

From then on, Seto had his suspicions every single time Bakura approached him for anything. He mixed it up a bit and made sure that he bothered Seto for things unrelated to his chocolate shenanigans just to keep him guessing. But, every so often, Bakura would take him on a whole adventure just to result in him chucking a chocolate into the ocean or dropping one down a seemingly bottomless pit or whatever the hell else he felt like doing to waste the candy.

There was one time where he even got Mokuba in on one of his stupid pranks. He'd helped Bakura acquire a hydraulic press, and the two of them were absolutely giddy as they watched the helpless chocolate be crushed by it after stringing Seto along all day, as Seto stared past it and into the ends of the universe itself. Why does he put up with this guy, again?

One of these events, probably number eighteen or so, was actually entertaining to watch. Bakura has quite an affinity for knives, so sometimes he likes to show Seto some tricks he can do with them. Seeing a wrapped chocolate get impaled on the ceiling was interesting, even if it did mean he had to call someone in to clean the unnecessary mess.

Seto has long lost count of how many chocolates have been destroyed in front of him, but he has a feeling he's almost free. If Bakura doesn't stop after four or five more times, Seto is ready to assume he got another set on his own and thus the torment will never end. He wants to doubt that Bakura would waste Ryou's money like that, but Bakura is fucking inscrutable and has no apparent respect for money anyway.

For once, when Bakura walks right into Seto's room without knocking, he actually _isn't_ in the middle of anything, just checking some card rulings online. It's still tempting to get up when Bakura sits across his lap, though.

Before Seto can even ask, Bakura takes out a chocolate.

"Funny. You never show it to me beforehand," Seto comments. It's also odd that Bakura would make himself comfortable before the prank, since he usually makes Seto follow him around for no reason.

"Not until it's about to be destroyed," Bakura says. Seto immediately closes his laptop and pushes it away, suddenly anxious that Bakura might get chocolate in the keyboard.

He laughs and Seto is very close to pushing him off his lap until he sees Bakura actually unwrap the chocolate. He normally doesn't bother, especially since the bright red wrapper makes it easier to see than if it were unwrapped.

"You know, I've never actually tried one of these," he says idly, turning it in his fingers like he's inspecting it.

"Couldn't've guessed."

Bakura chuckles through an infuriatingly attractive smile and Seto almost instinctively punches himself in the chest when his heart reacts. He _guesses_ Bakura can stay on his lap.

Seto is genuinely surprised when Bakura pops it into his mouth. He's actually... eating it. Like how a normal person would do it. He unwrapped a chocolate and put it in his mouth, like a human. It occurs to Seto that he might be dreaming.

Bakura has to be fucking with him somehow. He's about to stand up and say some shit like "Ha! I fooled you! It was a double! The real chocolate is here!" and throw the real one out the window or something, surely.

"Alright, what's the trick?" Seto asks to get it over with. Bakura looks at him like he has no idea what he's talking about. At least he's not talking with his mouth full.

"You've made it abundantly clear that you'd rather die than actually eat the chocolates you made me get for you, so what's the trick?"

Bakura just stares at him for a moment, and then kisses him with the chocolate still in his mouth. It doesn't last longer than a second, just one of his teasing "just a joke" pecks.

Fuck it, Seto spent good money on those chocolates. He grabs Bakura by the chin and, for the first time, kisses him back. It takes Bakura completely by surprise, if him jostling in Seto's lap and his mouth going slack serve as any indication. It's easy to get a taste of the chocolate while Bakura is still stunned, but Seto doesn't keep it going much longer than that.

"It's good, so fuck you for wasting so many of them," he says. "Now get off of me."

Bakura swallows the chocolate and licks his lips-- Seto rolls his eyes and pretends he doesn't want to see that a thousand more times-- but he stays where he is. When Seto finally looks at him again, he looks serious.

"I'm out of chocolates, Seto."

"Still never said you could use my given name," Seto replies, on instinct at this point.

"You just made out with me and you want me to call you the name you share with your little--"

"You know what? Seto is fine."

Bakura smirks at that.

"Tell you what. Buy me more chocolates, and I'll actually eat them this time. Maybe we could share."

Not even going to say please? Bakura sure is used to just getting his way no matter what.

And Seto is a fool for always giving into him without fail.


End file.
